Sunday, December 21, 2008

Good Parenting - Top 3 Parenting Skills for Happy Kids

Love. Care. Time.

It is a challenge. It is the single most important role a person can ever tackle. It is parenting. Our children's future successes and problems stem around are abilities as parents. This alone can be an overwhelming feeling and responsibility. Thank heavens we don’t have to go it alone. Mind you, there is not a user manual for raising kids, but there is an abundance of parenting websites with professional guidance for the different areas of parenting and loads of guidance from parents themselves so you don’t have to go it alone.

In the hustle and bustle of it all, good parents with good parenting skills remember that while they are working for a better future, their kids are growing up and need their parents’ love, care and time. These are the three heavily valued offerings in parenting and each of these three areas encompasses a large spectrum.

As parents we know how much we love our children. However, our children don’t know that. We tell them of course, but even then, for a child feeling the love is what lets them know they are loved.

Good parents adhere to the following on a daily basis:

  • Keep the promises you make to your kids.
  • Tell them everyday how much you love them.
  • Teach them the things that are good for them every day. For example: the importance of healthy foods and the importance of exercise.
  • Every day you should have a play time together with no distractions.
  • Listen when your children talk to you and answer them. Acknowledge that you hear them. I know it can be overwhelming sometimes but you can use gestures, and smiles as well to let them know you see and hear what they are saying to you. This is the foundation for confidence and self-esteem and lets them know they matter.
Good parents ensure their children know how much you love them from now as opposed to them realizing it when they grow older and have kids of their own.

There is emotional, cognitive and physical care.

Physical care encompasses all the tasks good parents do to take care of their kids and family on a whole. Washing, cooking, cleaning, buying toys and things to keep our kids safe, picking up friends, birthday parties, etc. Physical care is something done on auto pilot. It is so much a part of our everyday and every minute. However being on auto pilot and on overload is the culprit that causes parents to neglect the emotional and cognitive care of their children.

For emotional and cognitive care a good parent teach:
  • How to handle emotions like fear and jealousy by talking things through and modeling good emotional behavior.
  • They need to ensure their children put this into practice by having a social life with other children within his age group.
  • Make sure your child is challenged intellectually every day through conversation, games and books, extracurricular activities, outings where he can learn things, see and experience the world around him.

Such an important gift. Wouldn’t you say? How many times have you heard a person say, “There just isn’t enough time in the day for everything that needs to be done.”? As adults we don’t have enough time to take care of all our responsibilities in the day, and it is for this reason parents tend to short their children of their time.

Time devoted to your children needs to be undertaken every day. Not every once in a while, or once a month, or when you have an extra minute from your busy schedule, but every day. Good parents give their child the gift of their time and attention every day and their children reap tremendous rewards.

Giving your child your time and attention is the surest way to demonstrate your love to your child. Time also enables a good parent to know his child by talking to him, spending time and seeing how he operates, what he likes and doesn’t like, how he grows and matures and what areas are his strengths and weaknesses. This is important because one role of good parenting is to build your child’s strengths and strengthen his weaknesses. This will be of huge benefit to him as an older child and in adulthood.

There are many tasks parents undertake daily and can be done partially with their children. Toddlers love to help with tasks. Let them be involved for a little while and help you. This is also a fabulous learning time for your child. He can see how you do things with care and love.

It isn’t easy all the time to encompass these areas every day and every parent knows this so don’t feel bad if you feel this way. However, you will find that each time you work on these areas you will enjoy it. In the times that you don’t just think about a new way of handling that situation so as to make it better the next time.

Use the 3 offerings of love, care and time in your parenting. The difference they make in your child’s growth and well-being are beyond measurable.

Today's Parental Attribute is:

Being a parent entails having certain attributes that make us good at raising kids. Sometimes these attributes come naturally to us sometimes they don’t. If they don’t, you have to work on them just like you expect your kids to work on their shortcomings.

One of these attributes is Patience. Yep, a biggie I know! Today, when at home, ask yourself, am I showing patience in my parenting today? Answer yourself truthfully, no one can hear you. Then adjust your behavior according to your answer.

Remember, parents have to grow into parenting just like their kids grow into adulthood. Much is a learning experience. So, learn it, use it, benefit from it.


Related Posts with Thumbnails